Penitence, guilt and shame

 

Sermon for the 7^th March 2021, St Matthew’s, Oxford

Readings:   Exodus 20.1-17; 1 Corinthians 1.18-25 and John 2.13-22

Today is the third Sunday in Lent.  The Church of England’s website says: ‘Lent may originally have
followed Epiphany, just as Jesus’ sojourn in the wilderness followed immediately on his baptism, but it soon became firmly attached to Easter, as the principal occasion for baptism and for the reconciliation of those who had been excluded from the Church’s fellowship for ..serious faults. This history explains the characteristic notes of Lent – self-examination, penitence, self-denial, study, and preparation for Easter…’   And this account of Lenten themes is followed by a 12^th poem about Lent

Now is the healing time decreed

for sins of heart and word and deed,

when we in humble fear record

the wrong that we have done the Lord.

So this morning I would like to focus on the Lenten theme of penitence.   And that poem reminds us that penitence is or should be a ‘time of healing’: a positive rather than a negative experience.

But looking at the passages for today - the Lectionary readings for the third Sunday in Lent – i.e. the set readings for today - it is not very easy to see how they speak to this idea that Lent is for self-examination, penitence, self-denial, study, and preparation for Easter.   I guess the three passages are linked together in some way as the people who choose the Lectionary readings always try to make sure they deal with related issues but I can’t see what connects them. 

I guess the reading that is most obviously connected with Lent is the reading from Exodus where we hear, for the first time, God’s 10 Commandments. 

The 10 Commandments are so well known that we might even be able to recite them and lest we forget them they are even written behind our altar over there.  They are so well known in fact that we can easily forget their importance: perhaps even treating them as self-evident.  

Some of them indeed embody moral ideals that are common to many traditions such as: ‘You shall not steal’ but others seem less self-evident such as: ‘Remember the Sabbath day, and keep it holy’.   Nowadays you can still be put in gaol for theft but not for forgetting it’s the Sabbath.   These differences in the commandments remind us that they are God’s revelation to the Israelites rather than a set of rules the Israelites worked out for themselves for regulating their society. The book of Exodus underlines this revelatory aspect to the 10 Commandments by having God give them to the Israelites directly, rather than through Moses, God’s normal way of communicating with the Israelites at the time.

The 10 Commandments form the basis of the Jewish Law as set out thereafter in the rest of the book of Exodus, in the books of Leviticus and Numbers and then repeated in the book called Deuteronomy.  And since Jesus said that he had not come to abolish the law but to fulfil it we can be sure that they apply as much to us today as they did in Old Testament times.   There is a sense in which everything in the Bible that follows on from God’s giving the Israelites the 10 Commandments, and that is about the rules we should live by, are, at heart, just an elaboration of those commandments.   For instance when Jesus famously discusses the Jewish Law in his Sermon on the Mount, he directly mentions two of the commandments: the 6th ,‘You shall not murder’ and the 7^th, ‘You shall not commit adultery’ and reinterprets them for his listeners of the day.  But much of what else Jesus says about the Jewish Law in that sermon indirectly refers back to the 10 Commandments or to his summary of those commandments: ‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind’ and: ‘You shall love your neighbour as yourself.

It is, I think, worthwhile exploring how each of the 10 Commandments gets elaborated in the Old Testament and then the New.  Not that there is time to do that today.   But just as one example: the 9^th commandment is: ‘You shall not bear false witness against your neighbour’.   In general, I have taken this to mean, ‘You shall always tell the truth’ but, of course, it’s more specific (and limited) than that.  It’s recognising that lies that hurt other people are a special kind of lie.   Exodus 23 verses 1-3 say:  ‘You shall not spread a false report. You shall not join hands with the wicked to act as a malicious witness. You shall not follow a majority in wrongdoing; when you bear witness in a lawsuit, you shall not side with the majority so as to pervert justice; nor shall you be partial to the poor in a lawsuit’.  The other Sunday we were talking about social media and how it can easily it can be misused.  We might have usefully pondered on those verses when thinking about how we should bear witness against our neighbour - i.e. talk about our friends - when it comes to using social media.

Now some of the 10 Commandments seem relatively simple to stick to such as the 6th Commandment: You shall not murder’.  That is until you delve into what the Bible says about them in more detail.   Jesus says in the Sermon on the Mount: ‘You have heard that it was said to those of ancient times, “You shall not murder”; and “whoever murders shall be liable to judgement.”   But I say to you that if you are angry with a brother or sister you will be liable to judgement’.   I think we can safely say that the 10 Commandments as understood by Jesus are almost impossible to follow.

I have gone on too long about rules for living by when I really meant to talk about penitence: that is feeling and saying sorry for breaking the rules, like the 10 Commandments.  Breaking what we see as the rules can make us feel guilty or ashamed.  And here I want to make a distinction between healthy guilt and unhealthy shame.    The main difference being healthy guilt leads to a change of heart and action.   Unhealthy shame leads to demoralisation and inaction.

Healthy or appropriate guilt is the recognition of how far our behaviour, the way we live our lives, our economic systems, our social norms, etc. fall short of what God wants for us.   Moreover it’s important to remember that this recognition should be a collective act not just an individual responsibility.   I know that we are trashing the planet, through eating too much meat, flying more than we need to, etc.  but that is not just my fault, it’s everyone’s fault.  It also the fault of the institutions in control: the international institutions such as the United Nations but also multinational companies, national governments of both the left and the right.  Moreover the Christian church has played no small part in exacerbating the environmental crisis through its teachings on our relationship with nature and we need to recognise its role in that.

The recognition of how far away we are from obeying the 10 Commandments indicates that we have a general relationship problem, with ourselves, with other people, with nature and more fundamentally with God.  We should feel guilty about this relationship and we know that by recognising our dependency on God, God will restore that relationship. We all, like sheep, have gone astray and we need to turn to the Good Shepherd to lead us home.

This going astray (commonly called sin) and turning back to God in consequence (repentance) play a big part in some versions of Christianity.   So much so that you might sometimes be led to think it is the only important part of the good news that is the Gospel.  In my youth the Preacher at the church I attended would, virtually every week, remind us that there is an ‘I’ in sin.   Here’s the beginning of such a sermon I found from a bit of quick Googling: ‘There’s a reason the word “sin” has an “i” right smack in the middle—and a big “I” at that! Sin is all about me. When my world revolves around me, with me at the center of everything, sin is bound to result….’   

Now I think there is hardly any biblical basis for this idea that ‘Sin is all about me’.  Sin is much more complicated than that.  There is a sin called pride but pride is not the only sin and false modesty: to forget that we are made in the image of God, is equally sinful.  The notion that sin is all about me completely ignores the story of the Fall in which Adam and Eve - the first humans – by disobeying God – changed the nature of all our relationships and in particular our relationship with God.   It thereby ignores the fact that we live in a sinful world that we are all embedded in a sinful system.  But, besides such sermons having dubious authority, they can generate unhealthy shame rather than healthy guilt.

Unhealthy shame is unjustified feelings of guilt inflicted on us by others.   Jesus experienced such shame at his trial and crucifixion.   Remember he was, amongst other things, spat upon, stripped naked and whipped, and mocked by bystanders before he was finally crucified.   Human beings, throughout history, have inflicted shame on one another from the mundane (now recognised as completely unacceptable) bullying inflicted by children on one another to the truly horrific such as that inflicted by the Nazis on the Jews in the Holocaust.  But perhaps the most insidious forms of unhealthy shame are religious or quasi-religious. 

A big problem with ‘I in sin’ sermons and the like is that they can make us feel hopeless rather than liberated.  They can easily flip from encouraging healthy guilt to inflicting unhealthy shame.   It is certainly impossible to live up to the rules that God would like us to live by and we constantly fail to abide by those rules if we try.  This should not be a cause for despair because we know God forgives us (as we have been reminded today by our saying a confession and Jon pronouncing an absolution during this service).  But humans also have a tendency to feel guilty about things we shouldn’t: about things we have no control over, such as our sexuality or our appearance or even abuse by others.  And we can easily made to feel guilty about things we have little control over such as addictions or relationships that have gone wrong in the past.  Our capacity for unhealthy shame is extensive and preachers should urge us to guilt and repentance with caution.  I hope I have not fallen into a trap today.

This is not to say that our unhealthy shame doesn’t need healing.   For some of us shame can be chronic and toxic.  Shame by its nature is also often hidden.   What we feel shameful of is difficult to share even with those we love.   Moreover the idea that God sees and knows everything about us is for some a source of fear rather than comfort.   Psalm 139 which begins: ‘O Lord, you have searched me and known me. You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from far away’ is for some deeply troubling.   Even our notions of God can exacerbate shame rather than alleviate it.

While shame may often be hidden I think it is much more common than we might tend to think.  Those of us who do suffer from shame can think we are the only one who is and that is just not the case.

There is a similarity between healthy or guilt and unhealthy shame in that both can be redeemed and potentially transformed by the death and resurrection of Jesus.   We know that whatever we are guilty of, in the way we lead our lives, has been forgiven by God, once and for all, through the cross.  In this we can be certain.   We can also say that through enduring shame of all kinds, Jesus opens the way to the defeat of shame as of death and suffering.  But it is often harder, I think, to feel that shame can be defeated.   In my own experience the way of healing shame is through sharing the experience with another in whom you trust and who, after you have done so, will continue to accept you for what you are.   The person who loves you more than any other and who will not reject you whatever you are or whatever you have done is God.  

So yes Lent should be a time for self-examination and penitence but for a purpose: preparation for Easter.  Yes Lent should be an occasion for seeking forgiveness for those things we feel appropriately guilty about, but by God’s grace it might also be a time to find healing and liberation from shame.  In both cases Lent, like spring, should be time of renewal as we once again we prepare to remember all that God has done for us by his death on the cross on that first Good Friday and his glorious resurrection on that first Easter Sunday.

 

Sermon for Epiphany 2021

 

Isaiah 60: 1-6 and Matthew 2: 1-12.

 

This is my third sermon this Christmas and all three have the underlying premise that Christmas hasn’t; and cannot be cancelled.  And now it is about to be Epiphany perhaps I should also say that Epiphany isn’t cancelled either.  In these sermons I have sought to remind people that Christmas cannot be cancelled because of that first Christmas more than 2000 years ago when Jesus was born.   When God became a human that Christmas it was a defining moment in world history.   It meant that Christmas is going to be celebrated forever whether we like it or not.  It is not in our power to cancel Christmas although, over the years, some have tried to do so.

In my sermon today I want to focus on an aspect of Christmas - the giving and receiving of gifts.   The giving and receiving of gifts is part and parcel of Christmas perhaps because, as part of the Christmas story, the wise men who visit Jesus after he is born present him with gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh (as we heard in our reading just now).  But surely it’s also- and more importantly - because God’s incarnation in the form of a baby born to Mary and Joseph in Bethlehem that first Christmas is the greatest gift God could give the world.

I want to explore the giving and receiving of gifts as a sacrament.  St Augustine, in the 5th century AD described a sacrament as ‘an outward and visible sign of an inward and invisible grace.’  And I think there is a hidden, spiritual dimension to gifts at Christmas that isn’t affected by the Corona Virus or anything else.  My last mention of the virus I promise.

I suppose you might say it is a bit late to be thinking about Christmas presents: but it’s on this day, Epiphany Sunday, when we remember the visit of the wise men and what that visit signified.  And of course present giving doesn’t stop at Christmas.  I think we can safely say that receiving’s God’s gift of his son and giving gifts ourselves are things we, as Christians, are called to do throughout the year.

 As I said in my previous sermons this Christmas, some people, down the ages, have tried to cancel Christmas and all that it involves.   A well-known fictional example is the White Witch in CS Lewis’ ‘The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe’.   In this story the four Pevensee children: Lucy, Edmunds, Susan and Peter, stumble into the land of Narnia through a Wardrobe which is ruled by a witch who makes it ‘always winter and never Christmas’.   But the arrival of the children coincides with the return of Aslan the Lion to Narnia and the witch’s power starts to wane and the snow that covers the land begins to melt:

While three of the children – Lucy, Susan and Peter- are travelling through Narnia to meet Aslan, with two beavers showing them the way, they come across Father Christmas

 "I’ve come at last," said he. "She has kept me out for a long time, but I have got in at last. Aslan is on the move. The Witch’s magic is weakening.

And Lucy felt running through her that deep shiver of gladness which you only get if you are being solemn and still.

"And now," said Father Christmas, "for your presents. There is a new and better sewing machine for you, Mrs Beaver. I will drop it in your house as I pass. "

"If you please, sir," said Mrs Beaver, making a curtsey. "It’s locked up."

"Locks and bolts make no difference to me," said Father Christmas. "And as for you, Mr Beaver, when you get home you will find your dam finished and mended and all the leaks stopped and a new sluicegate fitted."

Mr Beaver was so pleased that he opened his mouth very wide and then found he couldn’t say anything at all.

 “Peter, Adam's Son," said Father Christmas.

"Here, sir," said Peter.

"These are your presents," was the answer, "and they are tools, not toys. The time to use them is perhaps near at hand. Bear them well." With these words he handed to Peter a shield and a sword. The shield was the colour of silver and across it there ramped a red lion, as bright as a ripe strawberry at the moment when you pick it. The hilt of the sword was of gold and it had a sheath and a sword belt and everything it needed, and it was just the right size and weight for Peter to use. Peter was silent and solemn as he received these gifts, for he felt they were a very serious kind of present.

"Susan, Eve's Daughter," said Father Christmas. "These are for you," and he handed her a bow and a quiver full of arrows and a little ivory horn. "You must use the bow only in great need," he said, "for I do not mean you to fight in the battle. It does not easily miss. And when you put this horn to your lips and blow it, then, wherever you are, I think help of some kind will come to you."

Last of all he said, "Lucy, Eve's Daughter," and Lucy came forward. He gave her a little bottle of what looked like glass (but people said afterwards that it was made of diamond) and a small dagger. "In this bottle," he said, "there is a cordial made of the juice of one of the fire-flowers that grow on the mountains of the sun. If you or any of your friends is hurt, a few drops of this will restore them. And the dagger is to defend yourself at great need. For you also are not to be in the battle."

"Why, sir?" said Lucy. "I think- I don't know - but I think I could be brave enough."

"That is not the point," he said. "But battles are ugly when women fight.  And now” – here he suddenly looked less grave – “here for the moment is something for you all!”

Now here, in this story, the presents given and received, while still being useful, point to, and signify something more.

The gifts that Mr and Mrs Beaver receive from Father Christmas might seem purely practical – just like the frying pan I gave Nicky one Christmas - but Father Christmas knows that a new sewing machine and a repaired damn are precisely what the beavers really want and need.   But the gifts that are more interesting are surely those strange presents given to Lucy, Susan and Peter.

Those gifts hardly seem appropriate for children.  Three of the gifts: the sword, the bow and the dagger, are weapons for fighting with.   Surely children shouldn’t be encouraged to fight?   But life will involve battles and children, as they grow up, will need weapons to fight with:  if not against witches, against the powers of evil.  The other three gifts to the Pevensee children from Father Christmas surely remind us that in life we cannot rely on our weapons and our fighting abilities.  We will need assistance in our battles: a shield for defence and a horn for calling for help.  Psalm 12 tells us that God is the shield and horn of our salvation.  We will, inevitably be wounded in the battles of life, and then we will need healing.   Note that Lucy’s gift of the bottle of cordial made of the juice of one of the fire-flowers that grow on the mountains of the sun is not just for herself but for her friends when they are wounded.  Later in the story the six gifts all turn out to play a significant part in events as they unfold.

Now what about those three gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh that the wise men gave to the baby Jesus.  Why did the wise men give those things in particular?   Like the gifts Father Christmas gives to the Pevensee children they are hardly appropriate for a baby and are surely much more suitable for an adult.  Like the gifts to the Pevensee children the gifts of gold, frankincense have meaning and significance.

 Matthew doesn’t tell us explicitly why these gifts in particular but they are clearly reminders of prophecies of Jesus in the Psalms and in the books of the prophets such as in our Old Testament reading today.  Here Isaiah prophecies:

A multitude of camels shall cover your land

    the young camels of Midian and Ephah;

    all those from Sheba shall come.

They shall bring gold and frankincense,

    and shall proclaim the praise of the Lord

 

Gold, frankincense and myrrh are gifts deemed fit for a king in the prophecies and this is probably one reason why the wise men have often been thought to be kings.  From very early on theologians tried to work out the particular meaning of the three gifts and what each symbolised.  It was probably Origen of Alexandria in about 248 AD who first proposed that gold was a symbol of Jesus’ kingship on earth, that frankincense (an incense burnt in temples) was a symbol of his deity, and that myrrh (an oil used for embalming dead bodies) was a symbol of the importance of his death.  Thus the gifts not only hark back to the old prophecies but point forward to Jesus life.

The gifts the wise men bring can in no way repay the greater gift given that first Christmas: God’s gift of his son for the salvation of all, but the gold, frankincense and myrrh were a concrete sign of the wise men’s gratitude for the child.  Matthew tells us that when they found the baby they were overwhelmed with joy and opened their treasure chests.  In copying the action of the wise men in giving gifts at Christmas we join in with the Christmas story and express our joy and gratitude for God’s greatest gift to us.   

This joining in with Jesus’ story is also what we do when we join together at Holy Communion.  Then we re-enact the Last Supper Jesus ate before his death on the cross and in a sense participate in that death and subsequent resurrection.   At Holy Communion the bread and wine represent the body and blood of Jesus which in turn are a sign of everything Jesus has done for us through his suffering and death on the cross.   The bread and wine are gifts which we are commanded by Jesus to accept, with his words ‘Do this in remembrance of me’ but they are also gifts that we, as his followers, willingly receive and feed on in our hearts by faith with thanksgiving.

As I said St Augustine, in the 5th century AD described a sacrament as ‘an outward and visible sign of an inward and invisible grace.’  The specific sacraments he had in mind were ceremonies such as baptism and Holy Communion, but other things besides.   But what is this grace of which he speaks?  It is that of himself which God freely gives us.  It is that which gives meaning to our lives including our gifts.  By God’s grace we are forgiven our faults and given a new life.   It is that which means that we are required to give our lives to God and thence to each other throughout the year and not just at Christmas.